Taking Responsibility

What I think the message of the law of attraction and "The Secret" is about is really just taking responsibility for yourself.

It means you have to give up a way of living that may not have gotten you where you want to be and it can be really difficult to do that. It often means taking the time to grieve all that you never received or 'attracted' and being able to now step up to the plate and do it now.

Taking responsibility means you are responsible for creating your own happiness and whatever happens in your life. Many people think that just because you have a good job, a nice house, a relationship that you are being responsible. They also think that just because they are an adult -over 21- that they are responsible adults.

You can have all of those things and still not be happy.

In the book "Taking Responsiblity" by Nathaniel Branden, he says that "The essence of self responsibility is the practice of making oneself the cause of the effects one wants, as contrasted with a policy of hoping or demanding that someone else "do something" while one's own contribution is to wait and suffer."

It is about giving up the victim stance - the idea that everything that happens to you is not your fault.

The thing is that it is a process of building enough self esteem so that you can let go of the victim drama. It is getting you something and it is ok that you do that. Everyone does to some extent.

In relationships it comes out in looking for someone else to make you happy. In career and finances it is about focusing on the solution to such things as debt or lack of money or working in a less than favorable job.

It is about understanding that you have a choice but it may be the most difficult choice you will ever have to make. It is about choosing you rather than sacrificing yourself for others.

Taking responsibility means taking responsibility for controlling your thoughts and emotions which are really the cause of your unhappiness, lack of money or lack of good health.

Your feelings will tell you what you are thinking at any given moment. It is just a matter of getting in touch with those feelings and not taking always taking action on them, but to feel them so then you can take the action that you need rather than reacting to situations.

For more on taking responsibility:
Accepting Personal Responsibility great outline of taking responsibility from coping.org
The Drama Triangle An article on the drama triangle that I wrote for another site of mine that talks about getting off of the drama triangle by taking responsibility.
Choices So often we forget that we have choices because they seem more difficult than what we perceive as an easier way out.